The Cowgirl Hat
Wednesday- December 2, 2020
Dear Marion,
I have always had a fascination with words, admittedly some more than others. They fill books, they can bring love in the form of a letter, a song from a favorite band/solo artist, and important expressions from those close to us. Words that bring joy or wonderful emotion are particularly on my mind at this moment. You famously and frequently said to us (growing up) to watch not only our words but very importantly our tone of voice. It matters not only what you say, but how you say it. ...if I only had a nickel for every time I heard that, the sum total would fill your grandchildren’s college fund.
“Lovely,” is a word that has filled me with joy since I was a teenager. At that time influenced by my school community, I thought for me to say it, it would sound unnatural, snooty, uncool. Natural with a British accent (yes) or possibly from an older woman or man...not a teenage girl from the jersey shore. Cowgirl hats fell into that same category(unless you were horseback riding). In the ‘80s, it just wasn’t cool to wear western gear in my hometown. High hair, designer jeans, live bands, punk, Madonna, and shoulder pads didn’t allow room for the cowgirl hat or country music. We were still sunbathing on the beach or in our backyard with baby oil or maybe at most 8spf sunblock...you made us use 15spf. I remember some even using the foil trifold held in front of their faces for maximum exposure. We all did whatever we could to get as dark a tan as possible..except for you and your reward was aging gracefully without wrinkles.
I discovered my fascination with western gear and a bit of country music (in small doses) sometime in college possibly beginning with The old Ralph Lauren ads. I didn’t admit and embrace it until a few years later when Andrew introduced me to Big Sky, Montana. We drove away from the airport and I remember feeling completely overwhelmed by the majestic trees, the crisp cool scent even in summer, and the colors surrounding us on either side of the road. It was one of the most profound feelings and moments, truly larger than life in every sense. On that trip, we also spent time in Park City and Sundance, Utah. I wanted to scoop up everything in sight from cowgirl boots to turquoise jewelry, fringe leather jacket, and especially the cowgirl hat. There was something so cool and empowering when I put that hat on my head. Even when we came home, I felt like I was choosing my own style and not the trend of the moment. For the first time since I started high school, I didn’t really care what anyone thought or even if they criticized my fashion choices.
Recently I heard a term that resonates for me, perhaps due to our Norwegian roots, “Friluftsliv”. The literal translation is (Fri)free- (Luft)air- (Sliv)life which is a lifestyle and a philosophy that can be studied even as a major in college. Sogndal is a school in Western Norway that offers the study of friluftsliv which also happens to have nearby a beautiful mountain, glaciers, and the second largest fjord. The thought has been in existence for 5,000 years but the term was coined by a Norwegian playwright Henrique Ibsen in 1859. There have been many studies on the positive effect nature has on the health of both mind and body...proof...Norway ranked as number 5 of the happiest nations last year. The belief is enjoying nature no matter the weather and no matter the extent to which you participate from a stroll to glacier hiking. The key is to enjoy and move throughout and alongside without taking or changing anything - coexisting. Friluftsliv is wiring down, disconnecting from technology, and truly experiencing the moment with nature alone or with others. The weather doesn’t need to be ideal in order to achieve this effect. It reminds me of dad’s philosophy when we asked about the weather….just dress appropriately.
The photo I posted for you is your granddaughter not only because I just love that moment but because it conjured up a desired feeling. She is carrying herself with such confidence and purpose. There’s that cowgirl hat, her feet seemed to be gliding across the sand like a paintbrush on a canvas, not a worry or bit of anxiety. How lovely if we could all feel the way she is captured in her moment of living with “Friluftsliv “. During the spring, she and I went hiking quite a bit and I can say we grew almost addicted to walking through the woods, it truly helped with all the uncertainty of the pandemic. I can understand my good friend’s need for fishing and hunting periodically as it keeps him healthy in mind and body. Andrew needs to cast his fishing rod even when the fish don’t appear to be jumping. I think they love the thrill of catching something but more than that they are unplugged and feeling the rhythm of their surroundings.
It’s so hard for me to believe but that little girl in the cowgirl hat is turning 17 on Saturday and will be taking her driving test. Appropriately to these written thoughts about interesting words and how they sound...nature and it’s beauty...we made Peppermint Bark. It’s multi-layered, full of flavor, and interesting, all that I wish for this independent thinker who’s saying goodbye to sweet 16 and embracing a new year.
I asked your granddaughter if she had any words she found interesting and her response...rubbish. Why? Simple - it makes her laugh. Words are powerful and they give us real emotion, set us on our path, and make a difference. Just like that cowgirl hat.
Talk soon,
Forever Yours
Quote:
“A rolling stone gathers no moss”
Old Norwegian Proverb