Good Friday-April 2,2021

Dear Marion,

  It is Good Friday. I started collecting my thoughts and some photos to share with you yesterday, but somehow I just couldn’t sit down and write thoughtfully and this is a special week. Maybe April Fools Day took over and rendered me foolishly chasing my tail. Many of the schools are off this week as is your granddaughter and in the past, we would be rushing around preparing for Easter Sunday and taking some day trips to do fun things in and around baseball season. As we no longer hear the pitter-patter of little feet, the to-do list has changed along with the COVID restrictions. So much time had been spent preparing for the Easter Bunny- baskets, egg hunts, bunny cakes, and a multitude of assorted chocolates and desserts. 

  Possibly the ending of a chapter in our family timeline has led me to this idea of coming full circle. Growing up I remember spending a good deal of time during Lent at our local church, but as I grew into my later teens I experienced lent in a different capacity. I began to appreciate the 5 week series of a topic presented on Wednesday evenings. You, dad, and I would attend and enjoy a nice dinner and discussion building each week on what we learned the prior weeks. The last week of course culminating with Good Friday, a somber and deeply profound day, and that experience making Saturday and of course Easter Sunday such an uplifting and joyous celebration. While my children were small, I don’t think I really had the capacity to feel the month of lent in the same way.

  I found some old photos of a path I used to walk a few days a week while my children were in the younger grades. One day I turned a corner and discovered a bush covered in colorful Easter eggs. Deep in thought, I almost missed it and thought what a bit of magic and the perfect spot to decorate. Just as I moved around another bend, there was a large Peter Rabbit in the form of a scare crow-style garden surprise. At this point, my smiles turned into a chuckle. These little moments are such a treasure and we need to keep our heads up so that we don’t miss them on our daily journey. Beautiful design, special moments, a new daffodil blooming can make us stop even for a second and change our attitude, lift our spirit.

  This week I started reading Think Again by Adam Grant. While I have just read the first few chapters, I wanted to share them with you because it is such an interesting topic. What if we stopped relying on what we know to be true because we were taught that it is and stopped questioning other avenues of thought or approach. That is one of the interesting outcomes of raising children. I said I wanted to guide my children, give them rules for safety, help them develop character, but essentially grow into who they are meant to be as an adult. Well, the truth I have discovered is not as easy as I had hoped. I can hear you laughing. There comes a time when they show you what their thoughts are and the direction they want to take and for me, it’s not always easy. Recently I have caught myself thinking wait I don’t like what your thinking and by the way, I don’t like that direction either. I hear you laughing harder. It’s time for me to take stock, stand back, and listen more carefully. Here comes the hardest part, allowing some of their decisions to become a mistake or failure because that is often how we learn. I’m still making mistakes and sometimes failing. 

  Design and art are filled with successes resulting from a mistake or failure. Following rules can help guide you when you are designing a space or simply dressing for an important occasion. The special ingredient I think is when you give it a twist, try something that is not part of the rules, and the outcome will be uniquely yours. Will you make a mistake? Maybe, but it’s usually worth it. Trying new things keeps us young in spirit, listening to new ideas may not change our minds about a topic but it can open us to appreciate a new way of thinking. 

  While I am pushing myself to unravel my ‘absolute ideas’ so that I may discover something new, I recognize that I have one child who thrives on our holiday traditions. We are baking the Bunny Cakes and sugar cookies too. As I was leafing through some old pictures, I realized we have been making these bunny cakes since my first memories but we usually only make them when there are young children attending our Easter celebration. Once again, working on unthinking my absolute ideas as there will not be any young children at the table this year. I can hear you saying ‘life is a process’ and I am going to continue reading this book(Think Again). Coloring eggs have also been part of our annual Easter tradition. It’s so much fun to watch what creations are brought to the table. We may not color eggs this year and that is ok. Sometimes we need to redirect our energy and we just might find a new passion project. Even with tradition, it is sometimes important to leave room for some new traditions to be created.

Happy Easter.

Talk soon, 

Forever Yours

Quote:

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”

Mother Teresa

Honored in the Catholic Church as Saint Teresa of Calcutta 

Roman Catholic nun and missionary

1910-1997